
Table of Contents
Reading time: 6 minutes | Last Updated: March 27, 2025
Quick Facts
- What It Is: You and your partner giving each other oral at the same time – pure mutual indulgence where both get pleasured simultaneously
- Also Known As: 69 sex position, sixty-nine position, mutual oral, simultaneous oral sex, soixante-neuf, oral 69
- Difficulty: Easy once you find your groove (trust me, you will)
- Best For: When you can’t decide who gets spoiled first, couples craving mutual pleasure, lovers who want to build intense arousal together
- Why It’s Amazing: Building toward climax together creates electricity you can’t get anywhere else – it’s like your bodies become one pleasure-generating machine
- Common Challenge: Getting positioned just right and staying focused on both giving and receiving
- Perfect Pairing: Bullet vibrators for clitoral stimulation during the position, flavored lube to make everything taste amazing, silk ties for gentle wrist restraints, or a vibrating cock ring to add extra sensations for both partners
What Makes the Classic 69 So Wickedly Satisfying
Picture this: I’m lying there, completely absorbed in the taste and feel of my partner, when suddenly their tongue finds that spot that makes my back arch. The moan that escapes me vibrates against their skin, which makes them grip my thighs tighter, which sends another wave through me… and we’re caught in this delicious cycle where giving pleasure becomes receiving it.
That’s the magic of the classic 69 sex position. You’re not taking turns being generous – you’re both being greedy and generous at the same time. Every sound you make, every movement, every breath becomes part of what’s driving your partner wild. It’s like having a conversation where you’re both talking and listening, except the language is pure sensation.
The psychological rush is what hooks most people. You’re vulnerable and powerful, giving and taking, watching your partner lose control while you’re losing yours too. There’s something beautifully selfish about it – you get to focus on your own pleasure while creating theirs, and somehow that makes both experiences more intense.
Research shows that intimacy serves as both a trigger for sexual desire and a reward from sexual experiences, creating exactly the kind of feedback loop that makes 69 so addictive. When emotional connection combines with physical pleasure, it amplifies satisfaction for both partners in ways that solo-focused positions simply can’t match.
I’ve had partners tell me afterward that they couldn’t tell where their orgasm ended and mine began. When 69 works, it really works – you become this feedback loop of pleasure that builds and builds until you’re both gasping and grabbing for something solid.
How to Get Into the Classic 69 (Without the Awkward Fumbling)
Ready to learn how to do 69 without spending five minutes trying to line everything up? Here’s your foolproof guide:
Setting the Stage
Start somewhere comfortable – your bed works perfectly, or that big couch if you’re feeling spontaneous. The bottom partner lies back with a pillow supporting their head and neck. This isn’t just about comfort (though comfort matters) – it’s about creating the right angle so your mouth can reach all the good spots without your neck cramping.
The top partner approaches from the opposite direction and carefully straddles their partner’s head. Think of it like you’re creating a human bridge – you want access without putting uncomfortable weight on each other.
Finding Your Sweet Spot
Here’s where most couples get frustrated, so listen up: don’t expect geometric perfection. Bodies are different heights, different proportions. The bottom partner might need to scoot up or down the bed. The top partner can adjust their angle by shifting weight between their knees and hands.
You’ll know you’ve got it right when you both have easy access without straining. If someone’s having to crane their neck or stretch uncomfortably, adjust until it feels natural. Great sex shouldn’t require yoga certification.
Starting the Fire
Begin with teasing – light kisses, gentle licks, building anticipation. The beauty of this position is you can both start slow and let the intensity build naturally. There’s no rush to dive in like you’re starving (though sometimes that hunger is exactly what you want).
Pro move: Use your hands to guide each other. A gentle touch on their hip that says “right there” or pulling them closer for “more pressure” creates this intimacy. You’re steering each other toward what feels best.
The first time my partner and I nailed the rhythm in this position, we both forgot everything else existed. We found this pace where every movement seemed to trigger what the other person needed. That’s what you’re aiming for – that moment when it stops being a position and becomes pure instinct. It’s why we at Best Sexy Positions consider this the gateway to mutual oral experiences.
Master These 69 Moves That Drive Partners Wild
The best classic 69 isn’t about fancy techniques – it’s about understanding how this position lets you play with rhythm, pressure, and that delicious tension between giving and receiving.
The Buildup That Ruins You Both
Instead of going straight for the finish line, treat this like you have all night. Start with soft touches, gentle oral contact, building arousal slowly. When you’re both receiving pleasure, your bodies naturally respond in ways that amp up your partner’s excitement.
Every sound you make vibrates against their most sensitive areas. Your breathing creates these sensations. The way your body moves when pleasure hits adds pressure and rhythm they can’t replicate with their hands or mouth alone. You become each other’s favorite sex toy.
Using Your Whole Body
Your hands aren’t just for balance – they’re for exploration. Trail your fingers along inner thighs, grip their hips to control the rhythm, reach around to touch other erogenous zones. The more of your body involved, the more overwhelming the sensations become.
The weight and positioning create natural pressure that can be arousing. Use this – press down during intense moments, lift slightly when you want to tease, let your bodies create the friction that drives you both crazy.
The Art of Breathing
Your breath becomes part of the experience. Warm exhales on wet skin, cool air after you pull away, the natural rhythm of your breathing against their most sensitive spots – it all adds layers to what they’re feeling.
There’s this moment in great 69 where you realize your partner’s breathing has changed, gotten heavier, and you know they’re getting close. That awareness feeds back into your own arousal until you’re both riding this wave together.
When 69 Gets Tricky (Real Solutions That Work)
Let’s be honest – even the hottest positions can hit snags. Here’s how to handle common 69 challenges without losing the heat:
“I Can’t Focus on Both Things”
Here’s the truth: you don’t have to be a multitasking genius. Take turns being the primary giver for a few minutes, then switch focus. When you’re close to orgasm, focus on what you’re receiving while using your hands to keep your partner aroused.
Real talk: Some of my best 69 experiences involved one of us getting completely lost in receiving while the other got off on watching them fall apart. There’s no scorecard – just follow what feels good.
“We Can’t Get Comfortable”
Height differences? Totally manageable. The bottom partner can adjust their position on the bed – scoot up or down until things align. The top partner can change their angle by shifting weight.
Game changer: If traditional 69 isn’t working, try our side 69 variation. Both partners on their sides, facing each other’s pleasure zones. Same access, different geometry, often more sustainable.
“My Jaw Gets Tired”
Take breaks and switch to hand stimulation, gentle kisses, or just visual appreciation of your partner. Jaw fatigue is normal – don’t push through pain because TMJ issues aren’t sexy.
Smart move: Use these breaks for dirty talk, tell your partner what you’re planning to do next, or just enjoy watching them squirm while you decide how to continue.
Health note: While we’re talking about taking breaks, remember that oral sex does carry some health considerations – communication about sexual health is just as important as communication about pleasure.
“It Feels Weird at First”
Most couples feel slightly awkward during their first few attempts. You’re learning a new dance together, and like any dance, it takes practice to feel natural.
The fix: Start with humor and patience. Laugh about the adjustments, communicate about what feels good, and remember that the best sexual adventures often start with some trial and error.
I remember our first attempt at 69 – we spent more time giggling and adjusting than we did in any kind of rhythm. But that laughter relaxed us both, and by the time we found our groove, we were already incredibly connected. Sometimes the journey to great sex is just as bonding as the destination.
Why Classic 69 is the Best 69 Position Every Time
Here’s why this should be in your regular rotation, not just something you try once:
The Psychology is Addictive
You’re simultaneously focused on your partner’s pleasure and your own. That dual awareness creates this mental state that’s almost overwhelming – in the best possible way. It’s like your brain gets rewired to understand that giving pleasure and receiving it aren’t separate activities.
Perfect for Impatient Lovers
When you both want oral but don’t want to wait your turn, 69 delivers mutual satisfaction without the “okay, now it’s my turn” negotiation. Sometimes you just want everything at once.
The Feedback Loop Effect
Every response you have becomes part of their experience. Your moans, your movements, your breathing – it all amplifies what they’re feeling, which makes them respond more intensely, which drives you wilder. It’s sexual physics at its finest.
Use This to Build Serious Foreplay
Use this to build serious arousal before moving to other positions. After a good 69 session, you’re both turned on and ready for whatever comes next. It’s like the best kind of appetizer – satisfying on its own but makes the main course even better.
The first time I really understood why people get obsessed with 69, my partner and I were building toward climax together, and I realized I couldn’t tell anymore whether the sounds I was hearing were mine or theirs. That complete blending of pleasure, where you lose track of where you end and they begin – that’s what keeps couples coming back to this position.
Ready to Make 69 Your New Favorite?
The classic 69 sex position transforms regular oral sex into something that engages your whole body and mind. When you nail this position, you’re not just learning a new move – you’re discovering a completely different way to experience pleasure with your partner.
The key is approaching it with patience and playfulness. Every couple finds their own rhythm and positioning, so don’t stress if it takes a few attempts to discover what works for your bodies. The experimenting is half the fun anyway.
Once you experience that unique intensity of building toward orgasm together, you’ll understand why 69 has been driving couples wild for generations. It’s not just about the physical sensations – it’s about the intimacy of mutual vulnerability and shared pleasure.
Ready to explore more oral adventures? Our complete oral sex positions collection offers dozens of ways to drive each other wild, or discover more mutual pleasure techniques in our guide to 14 oral positions that make you both forget your own names.
Seated 69 Position
When you want a variation where he sits upright with legs spread while she positions herself over him in a downward-facing angle, the seated 69 position creates incredible access and control for both partners with a completely different dynamic.
Standing 69 Position
For couples who want to test their strength and balance while getting each other off, try the athletic standing 69 position that turns mutual oral into an impressive feat of coordination and desire.
Face Off 69 Position
When you want an intense variation where he kneels on a hard surface while she bends forward with her feet planted on the floor and her face between his legs, the face off 69 position creates incredible angles and accessibility that feels completely different from traditional 69.
The Best Sexy Positions Bottom Line
Classic 69 is pleasure physics – two bodies creating a feedback loop of sensation that builds into something neither could achieve alone. While other positions focus on one person at a time, 69 rewards you for being present with your partner and letting desire build naturally together.
We’ve explored every variation and approach at Best Sexy Positions (someone has to do the research), and classic 69 consistently delivers that unique combination of mutual satisfaction and psychological intensity that keeps couples craving more.
The magic happens when you stop thinking about technique and start feeling your way through it. Trust your instincts, communicate with your bodies, and let yourselves get lost in the rhythm you create together.
Try this position tonight and discover why some couples become completely addicted to the rush of simultaneous pleasure. Fair warning: once you experience great 69, everything else might feel like you’re only getting half the story.
Your Most Asked 69 Questions – Answered Raw and Real
Is 69 actually comfortable, or just something that looks good in theory? Classic 69 can be comfortable once you find your positioning, but it does require some initial adjustment. That pillow under the bottom partner’s head makes a huge difference, and you need to communicate about angles and pressure. Most couples find their first few attempts require repositioning, but once you discover what works for your bodies, it becomes second nature and feels natural.
How do I focus on giving when I’m receiving such intense sensations? You don’t have to maintain perfect focus on both simultaneously – that’s actually not how great 69 works. Take turns being the primary giver, then switch. When you’re getting close to climax, let yourself receive while using your hands to keep your partner aroused. The beauty is in the flexibility to follow what your bodies are telling you. Some of the best 69 sessions involve one person completely losing themselves in pleasure while the other enjoys the show.
What if our heights make alignment difficult? Height differences are completely workable. The bottom partner can adjust their position on the bed, and the top partner can change their angle by shifting their weight. If traditional 69 still doesn’t align well, try the seated 69 approach where furniture helps bridge the gap between different body types. Don’t let a few inches stop you from experiencing this incredible position.
Can beginners handle 69, or is it too advanced? 69 is actually quite beginner-friendly once you understand the basics. Start slowly, communicate constantly about what feels good, and don’t worry about achieving perfect rhythm immediately. The learning process builds intimacy, and most couples find their 69 sessions get dramatically better with just a little practice and patience. It’s like learning to dance together – awkward at first, then absolutely magical.
Should we use toys during 69, and which ones work best? Toys can make 69 even more intense. A bullet vibrator pressed against the clitoris while receiving oral creates dual sensations. Vibrating cock rings add extra stimulation for both partners. Even something as simple as flavored lube makes the experience more enjoyable. The key is choosing toys that enhance rather than complicate the position – keep it simple and focused on amplifying the pleasure you’re creating together.